Let's Play Dress-Up

As October approaches, I usually like to remind my readers of the excitement and fantasy-fun of role playing. The month of October is the perfect time to visit the costume shops and lingerie stores and find that fantasy costume of your partner's dreams. It's a great time to stock up on stockings, wigs, uniforms and costumes of all sorts. But this year, it's not the upcoming Halloween holiday that has spurred my creativity and has me writing this article, it's an event that I participated in over the weekend that has my juices flowing (creatively speaking)

For the past few years, my daughters have introduced me to the world of anime (Japanese animation) At first I thought, "Oh great, they want me to watch cartoons." But anime is far from your American Spongebob, Bugs Bunny and Family Guy. Anime ranges from programs for children to programs for mature adults. Yes, some animes contain humor, but for the most part, Japanese animated programs are serial type programs that are very much adult. The characters are richly developed, the stories are intriguing and the animation is stunning and realistic.

It's easy to see that many animes are geared toward men as the female characters are usually very voluptuous, curvy and endowed with enormous breasts that at times have a mind of their own. However, many of the male characters are also created to look as we all fantasize the way a man should look....rippling muscles, tattoos, flowing hair, piercing eyes and enormous......weapons. And some male characters are created to be romantic, chivalrous and charming....the romance novel hero who sweeps you off your feet and wisks you away to a secluded shack in the forest.

In watching anime of the past few years, I have found myself actually having fantasies about certain male characters. Whether it's the character's look or the storyline, I find myself completely enamoured and drawn into this animated fantasy life. At first, I thought I was weird.....I mean, come on, fantasies about an animated character? However, I learned very quickly that I was not alone. It is quite common to bring anime and fantasy together.

That brings me to this past weekend. For months, I had promised to take my younger daughter to a local anime convention. In addition, we were going to attend in Cosplay. Cosplay is the combination of two words "costume" and "play". Cosplaying is dressing up as a character from a program you enjoy....mostly Japanese animes. We Cosplayed my daughter's choice in animes, which was a program geared toward the younger set. I wrapped myself in a traditional Japanese Yukata, cinched my waist by wrapping an Obi around me 3 times and donning traditional Japanese Getas (wooden sandals) I also had a cherry tree on top of my head.....but that doesn't add anything to the point of this article.

As we entered the event space, as far as the eye could see, were people of all ages dressed as their favorite anime characters. There were girls in very skimpy, lacy dresses, men wearing leather jackets and carrying enormous weapons. It was fun and exciting......and as I say exciting, I mean exciting in an adult sort of way. I found myself checking out the fantasy type costumes of the men, seeing if I recognized any characters. Then I actually starting hoping to see the characters I fantasize about most. I even wondered to myself just how I would react if I were to come face to face with one of my fantasy anime characters brought to real life.

I realized that there was more of an appeal to dressing in Cosplay than the "fun" a child would want to have. For an adult, Cosplaying can be much more than that. Cosplaying is no different from the prelude to bedroom role playing.....but it is done in public. So this act of dressing up that I once believed was just something kids, anime geeks and sci-fi nuts did for giggles, became much more. It was a type of exhibitionism. It was a type of role playing....stepping into a character role and playing it out fully from the clothing down to the pose you strike when someone asks to take your photograph.

Now I'm not saying that this is typical for all Cosplayers....I'm sure many do it just for fun. And I too will do it again....just for fun. But I will continue to look high and low for my dreamy anime hero in black, carrying a huge cello case or the sexy, powerful soul reaper dressed in a black with a huge sword carried across his broad, muscular back. I will keep my fantasies to myself.....for now...and in public. That is, until I find the one who will dress for me and help me fulfill my anime fantasies.

So remember girls and guys.....role playing and dressing up can be alot of fun and extremely arousing. Ask your partner to share their wildest fantasies.....or look around you and figure out what your partner likes....and surprise them. Either way, stepping away from "you" and stepping into another character can open doors that you never imagined. Leave your inhibitions behind and just go wild! After all, you are not "you"....but someone who can be far more demure or far more naughty that "you" ever could be.

The Exercise That Improves Your Orgasm

Who doesn't want better orgasms? But how about stronger, more powerful, earth-shattering orgasms that you can actually control....with no hands? Yes, ladies and gents, there is an exercise that can give you exactly that. But before you grab the gym bag and put on your spandex, listen to this. You can do this exercise anytime, anywhere. As a matter of fact, I am doing the exercise as I type this.

I am sure you have heard of the Kegal exercise and it's benefits. For those of you whom haven't heard...allow me to give you a brief rundown on the Kegal exercise and it's medical benefits. Then we'll discuss the mind-blowing sexual benefits it has for both men and women.

The Kegal exercise is simply tightening and loosening your pelvic muscles. The easiest way to learn how to perform kegal exercises is while you are urinating. Several time during urination, tighten your muscles and stop the flow of urine. Release. Do this several times until you get the hang of it. Once you understand how it feels to tighten the pelvic muscles, you can practice doing Kegal exercises anytime. There are also Kegal exercisers that you can purchase that can help you strengthen your pelvic floor muscles even more.

The Kegal exercise has many medical benefits for women and men. For women, this exercise strengthens the pelvic floor, strengthens the muscles that line the vagina as well as strengthening the muscles the control the bladder. This makes for better vaginal health and prevents incontinence as we age. For men, the Kegal exercise strengthens the prostate, can reduce inflammation from prostate illnesses and also prevents bladder incontinence.

Though all of that sounds pretty mundane and like doctor's office talk, the Kegal exercises can do amazing things for your sex life. Let's start with the men. Simply put, if you master the Kegal exercise, you'll no longer have to think of baseball, balancing the checkbook or your 80 year old neighbor in a thong in order to delay ejaculation. With strong pelvic muscles and control of those muscles, you will be able to maintain a harder, more powerful erection as well as holding back ejaculation and making intercourse last longer. Who doesn't want that? And think about it fellas, a harder, more powerful erection paired with longer intercourse results in a better orgasm for you.

Ladies, the Kegal exercise has even more surprises in store for you. Mastering the Kegal exercise not only makes your vagina tighter and healthier, it will allow you to control your orgasms and actually amp them up, making them more dynamic and powerful. Yes, you can excite him with a little vaginal squeeze here and there, but using your new found vaginal strength can benefit you if you time it just right.

You can practice this on your own, while masturbating, until you get the hang of it. While pleasuring yourself manually (this is one to leave the toys in the drawer) bring yourself to the point of arousal where you are not quite ready to orgasm, yet you know you just can't stop and go back to watching television or vacuuming the carpet. At this point, while still giving yourself clitoral stimulation, start flexing your vaginal muscles. You will feel an increase in stimulation and arousal. Keep trying this off and on until you are on the brink of orgasm. At that time flex your vaginal muscles and hold them as long as you can. As you near orgasm, flex and release, flex and release, flex and release.....until you climax. You'll notice that the flexing seems to bring the orgasm on more quickly. It draws more blood into the labia, clitoris and vagina, making everything much more sensitive. With practice, you can learn to delay your orgasm....building it to a delicious intensity...and release when you are ready. The stronger muscles will also give you an even stronger orgasm.

So ladies and gentlemen in addition to taking care of your health, take care of your sexual health and practice your Kegals. Do your Kegals while cooking dinner, mowing the lawn or while you're on the computer! Your body, and your partner, will thank you!

Add A Little "Quiver" To Your Valentines Night!

I am always one to want to try out new gizmos, gadgets and potions on the market and when a box of Durex Play's "Quiver" landed in my mailbox via a sweepstakes win, I couldn't wait to try it!

The box contains blister packs of lube circles that you pop in the freezer before use. For those of you who have kids, hide them far away from the ice cubes, popcicles and ice cream! Once frozen, these incredible little circular goodies can be used for personal lubrication or massage.

The package is very easy to open and the product isn't slippery upon first touch, so it's easy to handle. About the size of a half dollar and approximately half an inch thick, the product packs alot of lubricant into a small package. Plenty of slippery fun for an evening of play!

The Quiver frozen lube feels absolutely incredible! There is no "shocking" feel of cold, moreso a pleasant quiver of cool! The products melts sensuously, almost like an expensive chocolate truffle. The feeling is decadent, sexy and amazing!

The more the disc melts, the thinner the lubricant gets. It has staying power, lasting longer than most lubricants I have tried and there is no burning sensation on those oh-so-sensitive areas. He enjoyed the feeling of the melting disc as much as I did, so this isn't just something we ladies can keep to ourselves...this is a must share sensation.

As the lubricant starts to dry a bit, it's not nearly as sticky as most, however just one little drop of water brings the lubricant back to life! This makes one little disc last and last and last! Who doesn't love staying power?

There was no staining or odd lubricant scent lingering after use and clean up wasn't necessary, unless there was a fair amount on the hands....then all it took was a small drop of soap and it washed away with no residue.

You can find Durex Play's "Quiver" near the condoms and lubricants in most drug stores and other retailers. The price is very affordable and there are several discs in each box. I HIGHLY recommend this product...as a matter of fact, I'm adding this to my list of top 5 favorite playthings of all time. And after 13 years as an adult product distributor, that is saying a lot!

So if you would like to add a little something different to your Valentines night, forget all of the expensive products claiming to give you all of these "special sensations", try Durex "Quiver" and you'll have goosebumps from much more than that frozen little disc!

Ms. E Reviews Durex Play "Utopia" Female Arousal Gel

I have written previous articles on female arousal gels, however, they have always been mail order or "as seen on TV" products. With more and more arousal gels popping up on drug store and supermarket shelves, I thought it was time to start reviewing these products and give YOU the scoop on whether they hold true to their promises.

First up is "Utopia" Female Arousal Gel made my Durex. The product claims to have been "created and tested by women for women using a unique combination of ingerdients designed to stimulate, increase desire and bring you intense sensations."

*Sensations you can feel.
*Smoothe silk-like texture
*Water soluble and non-staining

The box also advises to apply and reapply until you find the effect you desire.

I gave the Utopia a test run to see if it held up to the name "Utopia". Yes, I could feel the sensations, though it wasn't an immediate "yowza", it felt cool, tingly and slightly arousing. The texture is very smoothe and (most importantly) not sticky. However, the effect didn't last long at all and definitely didn't give me the wow effect that I look for in a female arousal product. I liked the little pump dispenser....lubricant can sometimes be so messy, but with the way the product Fizzled out (for me personally), I should have hit that pump a few more times throughout lovemaking!! (Excuse me honey, need to reapply. Hold that thought babe, need to reapply)Eh.....so it was good, but I definitely wasn't in "Utopia"...maybe more of a "mediocre ahhhh".

The product does contain Arginine.....which is a portion of L-Arginine...but not the full chemical. Therefore you aren't going to find the long term effects of better vaginal blood flow and increased ability to create your own natural lubricant. You'll only find that in a superior product that includes L-Arginine, which has scientifically been proven to improve the way the vagina reacts to stimulation when used on a regular basis.

If you are looking for a fun little tingly lubricant to put an extra zing into foreplay and lovemaking, Durex's Utopia will definitely fit the bill. The price is reasonable and it's readily available at your local drug store. You'll need to play with the amount, though, in order to get the effect you're seeking.

If you are looking for a product to assist more with arousal, blood flow, orgasm intensity and a better solution to vaginal dryness, you may want to try something different.

All in all, I give this product 2 out of 5 stars. It's a decent product, but just don't expect mind blowing, earth shattering orgasms from this product. You're partner is just going to have to work a wee bit harder.

Until next time.....stay sexy!!

The Female Libido Q&A

Watching our female Shih Tzu recently, as she pranced around the house showing her "stuff" to her mate, I realized just how lucky we human beings are.

All of us, at one point in time or another, have felt as if we're "not getting enough" in the bedroom. The next time those feelings of sexual neglect creep up on you, just remember how lucky you are that you're not a dog.

Female dogs go into heat approximately twice per year....meaning they "present" (get aroused) for three days. That's six days TOTAL per year! It's no wonder so many male dogs break free of their fences, leashes and electric fences!

So, we're not dogs, thank goodness, but we are humans with feelings, emotions and bodies that don't always cooperate. Read on for some Q&A on the female libido.

Trying To Solve The Mystery Behind A Woman’s Ever-Changing Moods

The female libido is a mysterious entity...changing with the tides, it seems. I’m here to answer your questions and hopefully, help you solve some of the mystery behind a woman’s fluctuating moods.

Q: My partner is never in the mood! Does that mean she’s cheating on me?

A: Whoa! Don’t jump to conclusions you may later regret. Unless you have caught her red-handed, nude and in the arms of Ramone’ the gardener, you shouldn’t throw around accusations of this magnitude. There’s a good possibility she may simply need a change, more romance or may be under some stress. Read on for some more reasons why she may not be in the mood.

Q: My girlfriend and I have been together for a couple of years. Why isn’t she into sex as much as she used to be?

A: Sometimes we all get into the same old repetitive routine. That repetitive routine can rear it’s ugly head in the bedroom too. Try approaching your sexual routine a little differently. If you usually get into bed, caress her shoulders, undress and have intercourse then repeat every other day, you may want to try and change things a bit. Slip into bed naked, offer to give her a massage or simply slide your hand down and start stimulating her clitoris.

Changing scenery can add a spark to any lagging sex life. Try jumping into the shower or bath together, picking a dark, secluded spot in the yard for some naughty play or having sex in the living room or kitchen. Sometimes the urgency of doing it "here and now" can add some needed passion and fire to your relationship.

You may want to consider introducing a sex toy into the bedroom or trying out a lotion or lover’s kit that includes all sorts of yummy goodies to share. There are also games on the market to spice up anyone’s sex life and help you to break out of your mundane bedroom routine.

Never forget the most important element of your sex life....talking. Talking to your partner not only reveals problems that may exist, but it gives you the opportunity to learn more about your partner’s fantasies and desires. Don’t forget to listen carefully!

Q: It’s hard to get my wife in the mood sometimes. What can I do?

A: First, you must understand that men and woman are very different "animals" when it comes to sex. Men, on one hand, are visual and can be stimulated by the mere sight of his wife bending over to change the cat box. Women, on the other hand, take not only visual stimulation, but physical, intellectual and emotional stimulation. I know it sounds like a lot of work, but you have already landed her, so you’re obviously doing something right already.

Sometimes a woman can get bored by the same old routine (see above) and sometimes she may just need you to go the extra mile to woo her into submission. Make sure you let her know she’s beautiful, sexy and desirable all the time, not just when you want to have sex. That can be as easy as telling her the new shoes she bought make her legs look hotter than ever or simply stating that she looks incredibly beautiful that day.

Now bring some extra romance into the bedroom! Light candles, give her a sensuous massage or run a hot, steamy bath for her (who knows, she may ask you to join her). Setting the right environment with visuals that evoke sexy, romantic thoughts and fantasy may be just what she needs to get in the mood.

Take the time to engage in prolonged foreplay. It takes a woman much longer to become physically aroused and ready for intercourse. If necessary, make it a game for yourself and continue the foreplay until she begs to have you! Make sure to listen to her clues as well. A moan or a sigh means she’s enjoying what you’re doing. Total silence probably means she’s ready for you to move on and change activities.

Finally, remember that your partner may be under a lot of stress and tired. Stress is one of the biggest mood zappers known to man! Listen to her problems and let her vent, take the kids off her hands for a while or send her out for a girlfriend’s day at the spa. Removing the source of stress or easing it will help her relax and hopefully recapture some loving, sexy feelings.

Q: I want to be intimate with my partner, but my body won’t cooperate. What’s going on?

A: There could be a number of things going on here, but the good news is that you WANT to be intimate with your partner. Sometimes stress can lead to our minds not making the connection with our bodies. We’re tired, worn out and just can’t seem to concentrate on the task at hand.....sex.

Take the time out to get in the mood. Slip into a warm bath and fantasize or read a racy romance novel. This may be the perfect time to invest in some adult movies. There are many adult titles out there from unrated mainstream movies to fetishes and subjects for anyone’s tastes. While shopping for adult videos, invest in a sex toy with a clitoral stimulator. This will provide you with some much needed extra stimulation and orgasm itself is known to be a stress reliever and a boost for the libido.

You may also want to try adding a simple lubricant during foreplay and intercourse. Added lubrication can intensify sensation, making you much more sensitive to touch. You could also try one of the incredible libido creams on the market. These safe and powerful creams have added ingredients that increase blood flow to the vagina and clitoris therefore intensifying your response to touch and increasing intensity and frequency of orgasm.

Finally, if after trying the above measures you are still having difficulty getting physically aroused, see your doctor. There could be a number of medical reasons why your body isn’t responding to sexual stimulation as it should including depression, side effects from medications, diabetes, thyroid conditions, menopause and more.

Q: I think I’m beginning menopause. Will it effect my libido?

A: Menopause effects different woman in different ways. While some woman may be nearly incapacitated by hot flashes, mood swings and nausea, some may have only mild symptoms.
All menopause symptoms are a result of changing hormones. Sometimes a dip in testosterone can cause a change in libido. In this case, try one of the female libido enhancement products on the market. There are various supplements available as well as creams and lubricants with added amino acids the body needs to become sexually aroused and produce natural lubrication. Always check with your doctor before adding a supplement, especially if you’re currently taking other medications. You may also want to talk to your doctor about prescription hormone creams or hormone replacement therapy if your symptoms are severe.

This fluctuation in hormones may also cause vaginal dryness which can cause intercourse to be uncomfortable or even painful. Keeping a lubricant at your bedside will help a great deal if this problem arises.

Q: Since my wife got pregnant with our first child, she’s never in the mood for sex. What gives?

A: There are many things that could be going on here. First off, pregnancy makes a woman’s hormones go wild. Some women aren’t in the mood often while others are insatiable. This shift in hormones can cause a woman to be nauseous, extremely tired and moody. Be patient with your wife and talk to her. In talking to her, you may discover that she fears that sex may hurt the baby. Encourage her to talk to her doctor about sex and if and when it is safe. She may be surprised to learn that in most pregnancies, sex is not only OK, it’s encouraged!

You’re wife may also be dealing with self-esteem issues right now. Her body is changing, she’s gaining weight and she may not feel sexy and desirable. It’s your job to reassure her that she is still beautiful and sexy and that she turns you on.

Later in the pregnancy though, you may need to get creative with your sexual positions. Your wife’s growing tummy may get in the way. Try side positions with a pillow tucked between her knees or the doggy position with you behind her.

Pregnancy should be a magical time for a couple. So relax and enjoy. Relish the fact that there’s no need to worry about birth control. Enjoy her voluptuous breasts. And savor every moment you have while it’s just the two of you.

The Male G-Spot

Just when you thought women were the most sexually complicated creatures on earth, you learn that men have a g-spot too! Yes, it's true. Women aren't the only ones who have a choice of two delicious types of orgasms. Those men who aren't afraid to venture into a new sexual territory can experience heightened sexual pleasure like they've never felt before...the g-spot orgasm.

Where it is:
The male g-spot is the underside of the prostate gland. It is located at the top of the urethral tube, at the opening of the bladder. Due to it's location, the male g-spot is a little more difficult to reach than the female g-spot.

How To Stimulate The G-Spot:
You can easily stimulate the male g-spot directly, by reaching it through the rectum. This may be uncomfortable for some men, so you need to go slow and easy. Relaxation is the key, along with arousal. Indulge in plenty of foreplay before hand so that he's fully erect and ready to go.
The rectum does not produce it's own lubricant, so be sure and use ample amounts of sexual lubricant when trying to stimulate the g-spot. There are plenty of lubricants on the market that are specially made for anal play. They are formulated to be thicker and last longer than regular lubricants. Avoid anal lubricants that numb or desensitize the anal area as they can cause injury due to the fact that one cannot feel pain. Pain must be felt in order to avoid injury and know that he is relaxed enough to enjoy the experience. Once he is relaxed enough, he won't feel any pain or discomfort. The same rules apply to any woman who would like to experience anal play.

Using an index finger, massage and relax the sphincter muscle at the opening of the anus. The more you massage and stimulate, the more you'll feel the muscle relax. Slip a finger into the rectum and curl it upward. toward the testicles. Stimulate that area by gently stroking until he experiences a mind blowing climax.

You can also stimulate the male g-spot internally with specially designed sex toys for men, curved butt plugs or anal beads.

The male g-spot can also be stimulated indirectly, from the outside of the body. You can do this by using your finger tips or a small vibrator to press on the perinium, the area of flesh behind the testicles and in front of the anus. Since you are stimulating an internal spot from the outside, you'll want to apply more pressure and massage more deeply. Take it easy and listen to your partner's cues as to how hard and fast to stimulate. This type of stimulation feels especially good if done during an orgasm.

If you're at all concerned about cleanliness, have him shower beforehand. You can wear latex gloves if you wish, and cover sex toys with a condom (if it fits tightly). Ask your partner if he's had a bowel movement that day. If so, the likelihood of contamination is lower.

Be sure and wash your hands before and after, along with any sex toys used inside the rectum. Never use the same sex toys for anal and vaginal stimulation as that can cause vaginal and urinary tract infections.

Intensity:
When the male g-spot is massaged internally, the feeling is extremely intense and climax may come very quickly. The climax is deep and like nothing you've ever felt before! So take your time getting there, it will be well worth it.

Sexual Orientation Doesn't Matter!
We Americans have been brought up with strict standards of right and wrong, especially when it comes to sex. We've been bombarded with opinions that were formed centuries ago as to what is straight and what is gay.
All men have a prostate, therefore all men have a g-spot. It doesn't matter if you are straight, gay or bisexual. Prostate stimulation has been around as long as mankind and has been a perfected sexual art form in the Orient for centuries (they used knotted silk scarves).

Having your g-spot stimulated feels good. And if something feels good, why not try it? If a straight man has the desire to try g-spot stimulation, it doesn't mean he's gay. If a gay man doesn't like g-spot stimulation, it doesn't mean he's straight. This just happens to be one of those myths, like going blind from masturbating, that needs to be put to rest for good.

Women 101.....A Guy's Cheat Sheet For Figuring Her Out

Women are pretty tough to figure out at times! What do they want? Why is she crying? Why is she yelling at me? Why doesn't she like the sweater I gave her? Why is she ignoring me....again?
Yes, women are pretty complex creatures, whether we admit it or not. However, if you follow a few simple pieces of advice, you'll make her happy more often. And when she's happy, your life will be a great deal easier!

Have you ever watched two women talk? Did you ever notice that while one is talking, the other is leaning over and completely captivated by what the other has to say? Women love men that are good listeners!

Never again hear her say, "You never listen to me!" Just follow these simple steps and she'll be talking to you and not at you:

Look at her when she's talking. Don't watch the game, even out of the corner of your eye! No laughing at beer commercials, the sitcom on television or when your dog breaks wind.

React to what she's telling you. When women talk, the listener always responds with words and phrases like, "You're kidding me!", "How terrible!" and "That's wonderful!" Simply replace those words and phrases with guy talk. Say things like, "Cool.", "Right on!", "That sucks (stinks, blows, bites)!", and "No way!" Nodding and shaking your head works too, as long as you are looking at her.
If she's got a problem, don't try and fix it, unless she specifically asks. Make sure you are really listening to her and not silently reciting the new Godsmack song in your head. Trust me, you'll probably be quizzed later.

Gift Giving:

There are two types of gift-giving situations: Obligatory and "just because."

Obligatory situations are birthdays, anniversary, Valentine's Day, Mother's Day (if applicable), the birth of your child and Christmas. These are situations where you must give her a gift or be subject to her angry wrath for a very long time...maybe even years! She will never forget!

"Just because" situations are optional gift-giving opportunities and include her getting a promotion at work, anniversary of your first date (sexual encounter, kiss, engagement, apartment etc) or any day for no reason whatsoever. Giving a gift "just because" is always a smart move, especially if you happen to remember the anniversary of your first date!

Buying The Gift.

Well, you know you need to purchase a gift, but what do you buy? Here are some easy tips on how and what to buy for her.

Never, ever give her an appliance or something practical! If she asks for a waffle iron or a new mouse pad, it's okay to give it to her, but always add a personal gift too.

Jewelry is always a great idea, but be careful to choose something she'll actually wear! You can do this by paying attention to what jewelry she wears to work, on the weekends and when you go out. Yes, there is a difference. If you just can't figure it out, ask her mom, sister or best friend to help.

Clothing is a great gift, but one of the hardest things for a guy to get right. You have to know her size, the color that brings out the brown flecks in her eyes and just the right style. Check out her closet for color ideas. For sizes, don't check her closet....women have fat sizes, skinny sizes, comfy sizes and more. Instead, check the dirty clothes hamper for sizes of her jeans, blouses, slacks, sweater and tops. You really don't want to know how she'll react if you get something that's too big! Finally, go shopping with her. I know, all you can picture right now is you, standing outside the ladies fitting room, clutching a pink purse to your chest. But suck it up and go one afternoon. Listen watch and pay attention to what she oooooooh's and aaaaaah's about. Then go right back and get the item in her size. If you wait, it may be moved to another area of the store or snatched up by another shopper. Again, you can ask her mom, sister or best friend for help.

Things to avoid include accessories like shoes, belts and purses. Women are very picky in these areas!

Flowers are good. Flowers are better when delivered to her at work, in front of other women. When ordering flowers, always order an arrangement that includes a keepsake like a plush animal or pretty vase.

Books, music and DVDs are fantastic gifts, but again, you have to pay close attention to what she already has and what she wants. If she has a favorite band, author or actor, go to the appropriate store and ask the salesperson if something new is coming out. If there is something new, preorder it. Look at her collection and see if she has a cassette of a band you can upgrade to a CD or a VHS tape of a movie you can upgrade to a DVD. You can always give a gift card, but give it along with a personal gift or romantic greeting card. The same goes for other misc.

Things like collectibles, craft items and hobby supplies. Give a gift card along with a small, personal gift like a plush animal, picture frame or journal.

A photograph of you may sound corny, but if she doesn't already have a picture of you, trust me, she wants one. Go to an inexpensive photo studio, dress nice and have your portrait taken. If you have kids, you'll make her dileriously happy if you take the kids with you! Buy a frame for one of the bigger photos and give her one for her wallet. Give the leftover pictures to your mom, grandma and dear aunt Sue.

Candy and women have a love/hate relationship. Women love candy. Women hate the fact that candy makes their butt get big. When giving candy, skip the enormous, frilly heart and give a small tin of gourmet chocolates instead.

Giving lingerie is tricky. You must know her taste like you know your beer! If you don't know this, don't give lingerie as a gift.....ever. If you do know her taste and style well, make sure you go to a lingerie shop like Victoria's Secret. They'll have sales girls to help you. Make sure you go prepared with her sizes (check the dirty clothes hamper).

Just as I said before, don't give something practical unless you add something personal. But there are some gifts to steer clear of, always...........

Gym memberships ("Do you think I'm fat?!") Exercise equipment or workout clothing ("You do think I'm fat!") Anti aging creams, lotions, washes, bath items etc. ("Fine! I guess I'm not young enough for you anymore!") Big clothing like sweat pants, sweat shirts, jackets etc. ("Oh, I see! You don't want anyone looking at me, do you?!") Cook books, cooking lessons or gift certificates for those "assmeble-a-meal" places. (So, you don't like my cooking?!") This list may vary from woman to woman. Being a good listener and paying attention to her likes, dislikes, wants and needs is very important.

Romance......

Can you say that word without gagging? Very good! Like it or not, women love romance! But believe it or not, it's not all about trips to Paris, expensive gifts and men with huge muscles and hair blowing in the breeze. For women, it's all about thoughtfulness. Yep, simply by putting thought into things you do and say, you'll make her happy!

Here are 20 easy to use tips for being more romantic:

1) Be a gentleman. Open her car door, hold a door open open for her, hold her hand and place your hand on the small of her back and allow her to go first.

2) Use candles during dinner, in the bedroom, in the bathroom.

3) Turn off the television and put on some music. Ask her to slow dance.

4) Remember the "just because" gift dates.

5) Leave her a note that says, "I love you"...for no reason.

6) Take the kids off her hands, let her sleep in or give her a day out. Be the taxi for the day.

7) Do housework.....the right way! (Remember, doing housework the wrong way will only backfire).

8) Run a bath for her (with candles) and warm her towel or robe in the dryer. Who knows, she might invite you to join her.

9) Listen to her when she talks. Look at her when she talks. (Yes, even if it's during football....sorry!)

10) Compliment her. If she looks hot in that red top, tell her! ( Don't just say it because you think she wants or needs to hear it....trust me, we know the difference.)

11) Show your soft side. Watch a chick flick with her, hold a puppy at the pet shop, look through pictures with her.

12) Rub her feet, back, shoulders, arms etc without being asked and without expecting sex in return.

13) Dinner in bed. Breakfast in bed. Dessert in bed (real food).

14) Walk up and hug her for no reason. Take that opportunity to smell her hair.

15) Show interest in something she likes. "What's that book about?" "Wow, scrapbooking looks hard."

16) Compliment her for being a great mom, neighbor, secretary, salesperson etc. Tell her your proud of her.

17) Do something with her that she likes. Take her dancing, have a picnic or go shopping with her.

18) Touch her face and look into her eyes next time you kiss her.

19) Never leave the house without a kiss and saying, "I love you."

20) Never take it for granted that she'll always be there!

Always remember that each and every woman is different. You may need to adjust things to fit her personality. Knowing her better is all you need to do to make her happy. You can do this by simply listening to her and paying attention to her.

Yes, it's that easy!

The Mysterious G-Spot

*Previously published on Club Mom by Edwina Caito

Over the centuries, the G-Spot has been one of the more controversial sexual subjects. Some scientists believe it exists while others try tirelessly to disprove it. The Grafenberg Spot, commonly referred to as the G-Spot, was discovered by German Gynecologist Ernest Grafenberg in 1944. He described his discovery as "an erogenous zone located in the anterior wall of the vagina." While scientists continue to try and discover the mechanics of this elusive and fascinating spot, we ladies know what’s most important. It feels good.

With most women, the G-Spot subject is more cut and dry. Either you’ve found it or you haven’t. Either you have experienced orgasm from this spot, or you haven’t. I read a study published in Cosmopolitan Magazine a couple of years ago that said, out of the women polled, only 30% had experienced a G-Spot orgasm .During my many years in the adult product industry, those statistics rang true with my customers. The remaining 70% wanted to learn all they could about this seemingly wonderful phenomenon.

WHAT IT IS: The G-Spot is a squishy area in the vagina about the size of a bean. When stimulated, the spot enlarges and hardens, much like the erectile tissue of the penis. The G-Spot area is made up of a bundle of nerve endings believed to enlarge and harden in order to protect the urethra and mouth of the bladder during intercourse.

HOW TO FIND IT: The G-Spot is located on the front wall of the vagina and only a few inches inside. It lies just above the pubic bone and below the belly button. Your partner can easily find the spot by pointing the index finger and motioning "come here" with palm turned upward. Finding the spot yourself may be a little more difficult and is usually easiest to locate from a squatting position. There are also vibrators and other adult toys on the market that have a curved tip and are specifically designed to help you reach and stimulate the G-Spot.

STIMULATION THE G-SPOT: In some women, the G-Spot is more dormant and will require a great deal more stimulation. In others, the spot will immediately respond. Stimulation can be done manually, with fingers or sex toys, or you can stimulate the G-Spot through intercourse. Positioning is the key in hitting the right area during intercourse. Since every person is different in body build and size, positions will vary, so you’ll have to experiment. However, many woman agree that being entered from behind is the easiest and most direct way of stimulating the G-Spot. Another good position is the female on her back, hips elevated and the male in a kneeling position between her legs. You may not get it on the first or even the fifth try, but I’m sure you’ll both have fun trying!

WHAT IT FEELS LIKE: Properly stimulated, the G-Spot gives you the sensation of having to urinate. To some women the sensation is bothersome and they just don’t like it. But recognizing that this sensation is a prelude to an incredible orgasm is important. Just relax and go with it. The sensation will evolve from "I have to pee" into warm, tingly waves of pleasure. If indeed the need to urinate doesn’t go away, either your partner is stimulating too far up into the vagina or you simply need to empty your bladder.

THE G-SPOT ORGASM: This type of orgasm feels very different from one resulting from clitoral stimulation. The G-Spot orgasm is deeper, more internal and will cause your entire abdominal region to tighten and spasm rhythmically. You may even feel an uncontrollable urge to bear down. From there, each person is unique in their experiences. You may scream in delight, curse, shake, quiver, recite the National Anthem or just sigh quietly. Female ejaculation is known to occur in a small percentage of women. So if you release fluid during a G-Spot orgasm, you haven’t lost control of your bladder. A fluid, similar in chemistry to male ejaculate, accumulates in the G-Spot area, another way to protect the urethra during intercourse. This fluid is expelled suddenly during orgasm. Again, this is rare, but does happen in some women.

Finding your G-Spot may not be on your top ten list of things to do, but it is certainly something that can add another realm of excitement and fulfillment to your sex life. Ready to go hunting?